It's official - I would be station in Miri from now on. It's expected but still in a way I was quite dissapointed. I was hoping to get a bigger chunk of market in Bintulu. I group my members today and tell them the good news (for them) that I'm staying put in Miri until further notice but in the meantime I told them the hard cold fact that there are possibilities that we will face a never ending war againts that humongous target being placed upon me.

I was a little bit stressed out yesterday. The two of my members try very hard to make me feel better by saying that they will give me their full support. Not that I question their effort or support but for me to go against a tiny market, head to head with a few other auto finance centres and against my own colleagues sounds a little bit scary.

After I sat down and did my own calculation, I lay out the blue print figure for the team yesterday. We need a daily disbursement figure at 150,000 daily in order to achieve our target and for that I told them that we might need to go all out for disbursement of new car instead of the usual used car. Not to ignore them at all but I think effort should be focus more on bringing in new cars because of the cutting points that used cars are going to cost us in the future.

At the moment the team is doing at about 110,000 disbursement rate daily which is not bad but it could be better. I do not think that it is enough for the whole team, it will not be enough to prevent all of us to be issued a show cause letter by the end of the third month and that I am quite scared of.

Boss had been telling me that I am doing quite well in my daily disbursement taken into account that I am quite new in this field, she said that it was actually quite an encouraging figure and I just need to keep that up. I do not know, what I know - It is not enough. I know because I've done my calculation. I need to push it up to another 100,000 if possible or 50,000 the least.

So today

I feel rather enthusiastic to go on a roll. I would like to keep that energy and be focus rather. It's not easy to managed a team because you as the main man need to be strong and can't be seen losing hope in your fight. I will do just that. My aim, I am going to be in Bintulu but nefore that I need to prove myself here in Miri. I will make them know that it is important for them to put me in Bintulu in order to increase branch achievement.

For that, I pray.

Yesterday we had a long 2 hours meeting after work. Initially it was supposed to be the monthly staff meeting but in the end my boss decided just to have a meeting for sales department. A few days ago, a few of the marketing officers had this meeting on how to improve processing time and to make full use of the resources that we have. I guess the outcome was quite pleasing in a way.

Currently we have 3 marketing officers and I'm one of them. So we are divided into 3 teams which is made of a marketing officer, an underwriter, customer support personnel and a sales support clerk - well, supposed to be that way but currently only one team was given a full set of cards and the another two teams, will be having bits and pieces of what's left in the office.

I was given an underwriter and a sales support clerk. There had been a reshuffling in the office whereby level 2 data entry clerk is not needed anymore and that responsibility will be placed upon the underwriter. Oh, and another thing - the underwriters will be call "Central Processing Executive" from now on.

Talking about underwriter, I used to think that underwriter is someone who writes will for the dead. I do not know why. Maybe because of the word "under". You know like "undertaker". *slaps*. but to tell you the truth, until now I could not find a word to describe what is an underwriter. I'd just say he is someone who writes recommendation for people. *grins*

In the beginning of my employment I was told that I would be heading back to Bintulu but before that I would be station in Miri for some time. Initially it was supposed to be this month but until now there is no news about it. To be honest I was quite scared because my target is quite high and there are 3 marketing people in this branch and we all are aware that the market in Miri is just about enough for the three of us.

I hope everything will turn out right. I thank God that I have 2 very experienced staffs under my team. I guess, I couldn't wait for the management to decide on my status. The time is now, the fight is on. Bring it!

A lot of people been asking me to get a car. Like seriously. Every time I walk into a showroom, the fellas inside will ask me to get one for myself. Imagine this, a bank officer who is handling auto loans do not own a car.

The case is not I do not want one. I'll give you two reasons.

1. This banker do not posses a driving license.

Hoi! Don't laugh okay. I know, I should have get one during my school days at least. Unlike any of my friends, my parents would not spend their money on things like that for me. So, after form 5 I was left in the dark, drooling enviously at those who had one. So I put that hope on hold. The problem is, it is not temporary. I put it on hold even until today!

At least I'm one step closer to that. I, know got a motorcycle license. (*grins*) Boo!

2. This banker thinks that it is not the right time to buy one yet

I have no explanation for this one. I do not think that I am ready to commit like 1/3 of my basic salary for a car just yet. But in the nature of my work, I would require one. A cikai one at least. In KL I do not own one because I don't think I need one. I have LRT that would take me to office everyday. Besides, residing in KL with all the enormous expenses, I do not think I can afford to have one.

At the moment I only need something that can move me around and I think going on bike is a cheaper and faster way because I need to run here and there to get things running. So, having a car is not a priority at the moment.

Maybe if I got transferred back to Bintulu, I will get myself one but not now

I got this from UMW Toyota, Miri.



A new year, well 6 days after and that is almost a week. People has been listing out lists of things to do before the year ended. Some got a long winded one some short one and some - none. They just go with the flow. Way to go!

Bonus, that's the big topic of the day. I read somewhere across the internet that bonus for my previous company is in today. Well, good for them. I'm actually happy for those who really deserved what they get especially for my colleagues in sales department. Hard work pays but in the meantime I'm a bit not happy the fact that some of the staffs that I knew they put in a lot of effort in their work but was rewarded in contrast.

A friend of mine, who have been working with the bank for quite some time, I think almost two years to date will be getting an increment from RM 1,500 to RM 1,800 or something in between I do not know the exact amount. I remember the last time she was paid an initial salary of RM 1,500 was because she is not a degree holder, she was in the middle of pursuing a degree.

She told me that she will be getting her degree like in another month. We are all happy for her. The sad news came with that because the management told her that the salary is going to be RM 1,800 the most for a fresh graduate. I was wondering what will she be taking home every month? I remember when I first join the bank I was paid RM 2,200 eventhough I do not any experiences in banking. That was 2 years ago and now two years after, they are offering this colleague of mine RM 1,800? A bit ridiculously insane and inhumane!

I was told that the very reason for that was because of the recession and they need to cut cost. My foot, your ass! You want to downgrade the post of an executive? How can you adjust the salary bar like that? If you maintain it, it's okay but to downgrade RM 400 out of it? That's purely inhumane! And so I told my friend that it is bullshit. Why they come out with such ideas? If that is so, I thank God that i quit long time ago. Well, not that long actually, at about 2 months or so - almost.

To be fair, i think there is no way that you can actually measure the performances of an operation staff. 2 months bonus, happy? The hardwork is not justified. Even people who work in a small town and go back sharp at 530 everyday also got 2 months bonus la dey! Happy for what?

Do you regret resigning from your previous company?

No. Absolutely not and you know what, I suddenly find myself full of angst now. Why? Because I think I feel for those who stayed and bled for the company. Digress a bit. Partly because, I really want to go back home or closer to home. It is better that way.

I think I move from a not so berapa type of bank to a better bank in a way, so i think I have no regrets or whatsoever. I do think that I can do better here than on the other side, financially I'll be better.

Like baby said,

God loves me. I think so too. and I thank God for everything that you've given me

I was browsing through the net when I stumbled upon this song :



Love it. I used to be a very big fan of K-Pop. To be honest, I still do actually just that I lost track with what's happening on the other side of the world. It's been a while since I last get myself crazy over Korean soap operas.

This song, which was featured in the soundtrack of "A Love To Kill", if you listen to it tentatively, you somehow can feel what he's trying to tell you, you know that he sings his heart out. That's what I really like about Shin Seung Hoon's masterpiece. Remember the song "I believe" in "My Sassy Girl"? That number is also by Shin.

Comes Monday,Comes what may, I'm looking forward to each day.

One of the things that I really missed about home when I was in KL was the rumah panjang mood. If people in KL have this "balik kampung" mood, our kampung is our rumah panjang, orang putih call "longhouse". In Iban we call it "rumah panjai". Not much different though.

A long house lives up to its name. It's a basically a very long house. There you go, easy to understand. My rumah panjai is located in Batu Niah, well actually just a few kilometres away from Batu Niah town itself. Have you heard of Niah Cave? My rumah panjai is just around the corner. (Don't get the wrong idea that Sarawakians lives in caves!)



Basically, I go back to my longhouse every Gawai safe to say and sometimes during Christmas, it depends but Gawai, it's a must to go back. That is the only time of the year that relatives from all over the place will come together and celebrate the togetherness within the family.



Usually, a few days before Gawai (some even a week) relatives will start to fill in the "bilik". Eventhough the direct translation of bilik in Malay would be room, in this case "bilik" refers to a house, a unit of within the longhouse. So, if everyone is back for Gawai - the "bilik" will be like a mass grave at night. Everybody basically just sleeps everywhere around the house. It's like dead bodies everywhere!



And for our family, on the eve we will always have BBQ at the back part of the house which we called "tanju". It's a nice, cool and cozy place. Great hang out spot, especially with Tsing Tao or Tiger in hand. Most of the time it's cheap beers because you can't afford to filled in everyone's stomach with Tiger or Heineken all the time. It doesn't matter.



The chit chat will go on and on till God knows when ...



The dishes will keep on coming after one after another. You'll never see the end of it ...



That's mum



And off to the pitt they go! Whooooooa!



Even these taste nice if your whole family is around.



And it won't be complete without this. A nice bottle of "tuak".

Cheers!

"How do you maintain a long distance relationship?"



For a moment I was stunned. I would've never imagined being asked that question. I paused and said;

"I do not know how, really. But I guess giving in and being able to tolerate with whatever comes along the way does help"

Anyone who's ever been in a long-distance relationship can certainly tell you how hard it can be to make a long-distance relationship work but not all will say that they perfectly know how did they make it work.

I do not believe that anybody like or intends to end up in a long-distance relationship, but sometimes it just happens. No one chooses to be in a long distance relationship, often at times they choose you. Along the way you might hear or met people that does not believe in a long distance relationship at all.

Distance between two hearts is not an obstacle; sometimes you like to think that it is true but there are some times that you might not. Emotionally some times it does hurt. It hurts because you can't be there if you're special someone needs you the most, you can't be the crying shoulder, you can't be there for whatever reason that is there when needed - it really hurts.

Some might say that you need a lot of faith in each other, yes I do agree but that is my dear friend, sometimes ; easier said than done. Even if you're not in one you sometimes find that it is quite difficult to do, what more to say in a long distance relationship?

Dealing with conflicts and when differences in opinions surface is quite a tough situation to handle. It's difficult to express yourself clearly on the phone without having to touch, to look that person in the eye and not being able to use your body language at one time. Sometimes, conflicts will be left unattended. Sad, but true.

But a few things I learn along the way is developing understanding, the word sacrifice, give more and expect less - does make a different. Although it's not easy but it's a thing that I myself personally want to do, sincerely. It was not always a smooth ride, sometimes there will be some rough patches somewhere but the experiences does matter. It somehow make me stronger and a better person.

And for that reason, I would like to wish my one and only, the love of my life, my dearest baby a happy birthday! And I dedicate this lovely song just for my baby.



Distance is not the hardest part, it is having to listen to the people who swear it won't work!

Every night I pray on bended knees that you will always be my everything. I am glad to have you in my life.

*Hugs and kisses*